Love Relationships & Its Magical Ingredients

Love is one of the most powerful human emotions and is why the experts are always studying it. They conclude that love has three main qualities:

Attraction being the “chemistry” part of love. It’s about the physical — even sexual — interest that two people have in each other. This Attraction is responsible for the emotion such as desire that we feel to kiss or hold the object of our affection. Attraction is also the reason for the flushed, nervous-but-excited way we feel when that person is near us.

Closeness is the bond that results when we share feelings and thoughts that we wouldn’t share with anyone else. When you develope this feeling of closeness with your boyfriend or girlfriend, you then feel supported, understood, cared for, and accepted for who you are. Trust is a major part of this.


Commitment is the decision or promise to stay and stick by the other person through the ups and downs of the relationship.

Combining these three qualities of love in different ways makes different kinds of relationships. Take this example, closeness without attraction is the kind of love we feel for our best friends. Sharing personal stuff and secrets with them, we give them support, and they stand by us. But there is no romantically interested in them.

Attraction without closeness is an infatuation or crush. You’ve physically attracted to some one but can’t feel closeness to that person as you don’t know them well enough yet to feel the closeness that comes from sharing personal feelings and experiences.

Romantic love comes when attraction and closeness are combined. Most relationships grow out of an initial attraction (a crush or “love at first sight”) and grows into closeness. It’s also possible for a friendship to move from closeness into attraction as two people realize their relationship is more than “just like” and they have become interested in one another in a romantic way.

For first time lovers it can be hard to tell the difference between the intense, new feelings of physical attraction and the deeper closeness that comes with being in love.

True lasting Love or just a fun Fling?

Commitment is the third ingredient in a love relationship, is about wanting and deciding to stay together as a couple in the future — despite all and any challenges or obstacles that life may bring.

Some Couples who fall in love while in high school develop committed relationships that tend to last. Quite a few relationships break up though. And it’s not because teens aren’t capable of deep loving.

Teen relationships tend to be shorter teens because adolescence is a time when teens instinctively seek lots of different experiences and try out different things. It’s all part of discovering who they are, what they value, and what they want out of life.

Another reason why teens have shorter relationships is because the things they want to get out of a romantic relationship change as they get a little older. Teens — especially for the guys — relationships are mainly about physical attraction. But by the time guys reach 23 or so, they rate a person’s inner qualities as most important. The teen girls on the other hand emphasize closeness as most important — although they wouldn’t mind if a potential love interest is cute too!

Teen relationships are mostly about fun and having a good time. To Date some one can seem like a great way to have someone to go places with and do things with. Having a Date can also be a way to fit in. If their friends are all dating someone, they might put pressure on themselves to find a boyfriend or girlfriend too.

For some dating is even a status thing. It can almost seem like another version of cliques: The pressure to go out with the “right” person in the “right” group can make dating a lot less fun than it should be — and not so much about love!

In the early twenties though, relationships are less about going out to have fun and fitting in. Confiding sharing and closeness become more important to both guys and girls. By the time they reach their mid twenties, most girls and guys value closeness support, communication, and a lot of passion. This is the time when people start thinking about how to find someone they can commit to in the long run — find a love that will last forever.

Good relationships how does it work ?

The first experience of falling in love, often starts as an attraction. Sexual feelings are also a part of the attraction. This stage could start with daydreams about a crush for a new boyfriend or girlfriend. Doodling the person’s name or a particular song being played could make them think of that special someone. This sure feels like love. But it’s not love yet. Not enough time to grow into emotional closeness that’s needed for love. Because these feelings of attraction and sexual interest being new, and directed at a person we want the relationship with, it’s not surprising we get confused with attraction and mistake it for love. It’s intense, very exciting, and always hard to figure out.The passion and attraction has a crazy intensity but this phase fades a bit after some time. Like the burst of energy we put into winning a race, this type of passion is both exciting and exhilarating but far too extreme to keep going on forever. Closeness must now enters the picture if this relationship is destined to last . The early intense passion may fade, but then this deep affectionate attachment will take its place.

Here are some ways people grow close together,

They learn to give and receive. A healthy relationship is about two people, not about how much one person can get from or give to the other person. Sharing and revealing feelings. A caring supportive relationship allows people to share and reveal details about themselves — their dreams and fantasies , likes and dislikes , their proud moments, their disappointments and worries ,fears, and weaknesses.

Supporting and Listening . When both persons care for each other they offer support when the other person is feels vulnerable or has some fear or worry. They don’t put insult or put down their partner, even when they do not agree. Revealing, supporting giving and receiving, is a give and take process. First sharing small details which builds up trust and a feeling of safety which leads to total sharing of all details big and small. In this way, the relationship gradually builds into trust,support and a place of openness, where each partner knows and believes that the other will be there not only when the times are good but also when they are bad. Both feel liked and accepted for who they are.

So then the passion and attraction that the couple felt early on in their relationship is not lost. It’s just different. In good healthy, long-term relationships, intense passions comes and goes at different times. But closeness is always present there.If there is a loss of closeness relationships can sometimes turn into what experts call “empty love.” This means that the closeness and attraction they once felt is gone and commitment then is the only reason they stay together.

How can a relationships end?

Love being delicate needs to be cared for and nurtured if it is to last through time. Just like friendships, relationships can fail if they are not given enough time and attention. Relationship needs the 3T’s time touch talk. For the teens it could be busy with school, extra curricular activities or change of colleges for adults work that he or she has less time for a relationship. Or maybe a relationship ends when people take different career paths .For some teens, a couple may grow apart because the things that are important to them change as they mature. Wanting different things out of the relationship could be another reason for separation. Either one or both parties may realize the relationship has reached its end.

Keep Moving On

Loss of love is always painful and when if it is your first real love and the relationship ends before you want it to, feelings of loss will seem overwhelming. Similar to the feelings of passion early in a relationship, the newness and rawness of grief and loss can not only be intense but devastating and hence the reason why it is called a broken heart.

If one is to bear the ending of a relationship then they need support close friends and family members to lean on. Losing their first love isn’t something they were emotionally prepared to cope with. Unfortunately, lots of people — often adults — expect younger people to bounce back and “just get over it.” If your heart is broken find someone you can talk to who really understands the pain you’re going through.

when you’re brokenhearted it seems hard to believe that you can ever feel better. But gradually these feelings grow less intense. Eventually, people move on to other relationships and experiences.

Relationships no matter short term long term or a lifetime — are all opportunities to experience love on its many different levels. We learn how to love and how to be loved in return.

Romance provides us a chance to discover our true selves as we share with someone new. We learn new things we love about ourselves, the things we’d want to change, and the qualities and values we look for in a partner.

Loving relationships teach us not only to self-respect ourselves but also to respect others. Love is one of the most fulfilling things we can have in our lives. If romance hasn’t found you yet, don’t worry — there’s plenty of time. And the right person is worth the wait.